"I'm Albert, but you can call me Albert."

Albert is an unlockable character in the game. He was once an unused character, but was added on 16-1-2017.

Bio Edit

Albert gained his trade experience on the streets of London and has not yet found a get-rich-quick scheme that he couldn't make work for him. A truly self-made man, he rose from being a shady local shop owner in Hackney to a well-known and well-respected businessman in the City. He can see immediately if a deal is a steal, and if you need to sort the buyers from the spyers he's your man. Just don't bring up his origins, 'cause he's a lil' bit touchy when it comes to stereotypes.

Weakness Edit

Albert does not like to talk about wealth and poverty, and is offended by terms such as:

  • A cheap suit
  • Homeless man's socks
  • Your house
  • Your Kettle
  • Made a poor deal with
  • Cannot buy a Stairway to Heaven
  • Doesn't own a color telly
  • [Is/Are] an uneducated nincompoop
  • [Is/Are] worthless
  • Wear(s) second hand clothes
  • Like a minging peasant!
  • You commoner!
  • You posh fopdoodle!
  • You son of a washerwoman!

Unique phrases Edit

  • The Cozzers (British slang for cops)
  • Your Kettle
  • Your pimply arse
  • [Is/Are] racist
  • Ate Yul Brynner with
  • Give(s) a butcher's hook at
  • Made a poor deal with
  • Send(s) you warmest pots and dishes
  • Used to steal from orphans
  • And stop being a berk!
  • And that's a load of bollocks!
  • And that's racist!
  • Innit?! (British slang for "Isn't it?")
  • Or is it about the way I talk?!
  • You ginger!

Trivia Edit

Albert is weak to "made a poor deal with", even though his bio says he can see if a deal is a steal or not.

Albert is weak to two of his phrases "Your kettle" and "Made a poor deal with".